She was emotionless to everything in life , she always knew not to let people in on what she kept inside , no one ever saw her break or shed a tear , she was always strong and independent , she didn't care what anyone thought of her and even if she did , she wouldn't show it  .

It was always astonishing to me the most out of everyone , after all she was one of the few that made me want to write , that pushed me to keep doing the thing that I love the most . Every once in a while I would ask myself , How does she manage to hide her feelings so well ? 

She keeps reminding me of the stories that I have read where the woman that went through an awful path still managed to smile , to accept life , to keep up with reality .

I thought I would never see her break even after I heard the heartbreaking news , I thought I would come in to see her like I usually do and I was right for half of the the time I was there . 

But just like every other human being she broke down . 

She lost someone she loved the most , her soulmate , the one who she spent most of her life with , the father of her kids , she lost him just like that without a proper goodbye . 

If anything she has the right to scream , shout even throw some plates here and there but she didn't .

A few sobs then not long after she took ahold of herself and covered up her tears . 

I remember looking at her and trying to hold myself from crying too hard , telling myself that I came over to be there for her not to make it worse .

I remember the first time I saw her face after the incident , I could see the happiness behind her eyes when she saw my friends and I walking through the door , attending our first funeral ever . 

I hugged her and I didn't want to let go and even when it was time to go , I didn't want to leave her , I wanted to be there for her , to keep telling her that we are all here for you just like you were once there for us . 

She talked about her sons , and I remember thinking how lucky they are to have a caring mother like her .

I saw her granddaughter coming up to her , sitting on her lap , it's like she was sympathetic towards her grandmother . It was such a beautiful sight that my memory couldn't forget .

Hell took place when we left , we were all a mess , we truly were . 

We just couldn't take it anymore . Tears and red eyes covered our faces . 

The sky was dark grey as well , it's as if the world was devastated to see her this way . I couldn't help but feel as if every inch of this earth was filled with sadness . 

The great thing about all of this was that she became a role model , my role model . 

If you would ask me who would I want to be ? 

I would tell you with all confidence ... 

Her . 

The strongest person I have ever met . 

The one that taught us to do whatever we want to do .

The one that told us to never care about anyone rather ourselves . 

The one that made my love for reading grow each day .

The world might see her as only an English teacher but to me she is much more than that . 

To me , she's a survivor and a hero .